Recipe: Potato Salad

Now that summer's over, it's time to show you what you should have been eating for the past 3 months. Also, give you 9 months to get ready for next summer!

Mmm, potato salad. Tastes like America!

Potato Salad
Serves 8

INGREDIENTS

• 5 lb Red Potatoes, peeled and halved
• 6 Eggs, hard boiled
• 4 Stalks Celery, chopped
• 1/2 Onion, diced
• 1+ Cup Mayonnaise
• 2+ Tbs Dill Pickle Relish
• 1-2 tsp Celery Salt
• Salt & Pepper

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Boil the potatoes: put the peeled and halved potatoes in a pot, cover barely with water, cover, and boil for ~15 mins until they a pricked easily with a knife, but still hold their shape.
2. Drain the potatoes: when the potatoes are finished, drain the water from the pot and replace with cold water (do this 2x) - you want to cool the potatoes so you can cut them.
3. Cut the potatoes: into bite-sized pieces and put into a large bowl.
4. Boil the eggs: put the eggs in a small/medium saucepan, cover with 1" of water, cover, and set to boil. When the water is boiling vigorously, turn off the heat and allow the eggs to set for 12 mins. Done.
5. Peel the eggs: when the eggs are cooked, drain the water from the saucepan. When the water is gone from the pot, agitate the pot so the egg shalls crack slightly. Fill the pot with cold water (this is to cool the eggs). You can also add ice to speed the process. When the eggs are cooled, peel. If you pre-cracked the eggs in the pot, it will be easier to peel - the water will have seeped-in and made the shell "loose."
6. Cut the eggs: cut four of the eggs into twelfths and then slice the other two eggs.
7. Mix everything: potatoes, celery, onion, relish, mayo, 4 chopped eggs, and celery salt - stir those together in a bowl (gently). Check seasoning, and add the appropriate amount of salt & pepper.
8. Top with the artfully sliced hard boiled eggs - that looks great!

RECIPE NOTES

• My grandma boils the potatoes with the skin on and then peels them later >> Yeah, well, I find it easier to peel first.
• Why not peel and cut the potatoes before boiling? >> Boiling small potato pieces tends to wash-out the potato flavor. The goal is to boil the largest-sized potato pieces possible. I cut in half because that will speed the process without washing-out the flavor.
• What kind of mayo should I use? >> Some people like Miracle Whip: traitors. I use Kraft Mayonnaise, and so should you.

Recipe: Chopped Salad

WTF is chopped salad? It's good.

Chopped salad close-up. To your health!

INGREDIENTS

• 1 Red Bell Pepper; diced
• 1-2 Cucumbers; peeled, seeded, and diced
• 12 oz Snow Pea Pods; diced
• 1/2 Red Onion; diced and rinsed
• 1/4 Cup Sliced Green Onion
• 3-4 oz Bacon; cut-up
• 12 oz Ditalini (or other small ring pasta); cooked, drained, and cooled
• 2-3 oz Sharp Cheddar Cheese; diced
• 1 Small Head Romaine Lettuce; sliced thin
• 12-16 oz Cherry Tomatoes; halved
• 1 Can Chick Peas; drained and rinsed
• 1 Chicken Breast (~1/4 lb); cooked and cut into small pieces (optional)
• Dried Cranberries
• Creamy Italian Dressing

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Prepare the ingredients: everything should be about the same size - 1/4"


• Red pepper: instructions on another post (learn something)
• Red onion: after dicing the onion, put into a wire mesh strainer and rinse under cold water. This will remove some of the punch of the onion - otherwise, the salad will taste too onion-y
• Romaine lettuce: take-off the dirty outer leaves of the lettuce and cut the lettuce cross-wise into thin ribbons
• Cucumber: remove the seeds (I cut it into quarters lengthwise and then cut the "wedge" of seeds at the top of the triangle (see picture)), then dice the cucumber into the appropriate size and shape

Cut-along the dotted lines

• Chicken: brown the chicken in a skillet--both sides--and then cut into small pieces
• Bacon: fry the bacon until crisp and then cut/break into small pieces
• Ditalini: cook in salted water, drain, and rinse under cold water to cool. If you plan ahead, you can put it in the fridge to cool completely. I cooked a pound of pasta because I didn't know how much I needed and now have left-over pasta in the fridge (can add to soup)

Ditalini in its natural habitat

• The rest of the ingredients are self-explanatory

2. Mix
3. Eat (you can dress the salad all at once or dress individually)

RECIPE NOTES

• How much cranberry should I use? >> I used a "handful." It's a to-taste kind of thing - it adds a nice tangy sweetness. Now, the size of my impressive handful isn't the same as yours - so start with a Cup and go from there
• How much dressing? >> Another "to taste" ingredient. Use your best judgment

Badass Lentil Salad

Never in the history of food have the words "badass," "lentils," and "salad" been thrown together. Until now.

Badass Lentil Salad
Makes enough for ~6 lunches

Lentil salad at work. Glamorous, no?

INGREDIENTS

• 1 lb Pardina Lentils
• 2 Boneless Chicken Breasts
• 1 English (seedless) Cucumber, quartered and sliced
• 3 Sweet Bell Peppers (assorted colors), sliced thin
• 1/2 Red Onion, sliced thin
• 1 can Chick Peas or Garbanzo Beans (whichever available)
• Handful of Italian (flat leaf) parsely, chopped fine
• 1/2 bottle Italian Salad Dressing

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Cook the lentils
• Add the lentils to a medium saucepan (make sure there are no sticks or stones hidden in your lentils) and cover with water by 1 inch
• Heat until boiling. Add ~2 Tbs kosher salt (or 1 Tbs table salt)
• Drop the heat and simmer until al dente (tender but toothsome)
• Drain in a mesh strainer, rinse with cold water, and allow to drip for a few minutes. Put cooked lentils in a huge bowl
2. Cook the chicken
• In a nonstick skillet, heat ~1 Tbs of oil (I used olive oil) over medium-high heat until shimmering
• Add chicken breasts, sizzle, and cover. Cook for ~5 minutes
• Flip the breasts, sizzle, and cover. Cook for another ~5 minutes (check for chicken doneness - if not quite cooked, cut in-half lengthwise and cook a little longer)
• When done, evacuate to a plate, allow to cool until ok to touch
• Slice into very thin fork-sized pieces - add to bowl of lentils
3. Prepare the veggies
• Peppers: cut-off the four sides of each pepper (12 sides total). Then slice into very thin pieces (see pepper detail)
• Cucumber: cut-off either end of the cucumber, peel "most" of the dark green skin, cut in half lengthwise and then half again (result: 4 long quarters of cucumber), and then slice thinly
• Red onion: cut-off top and bottom of onion and then cut in half (pole to pole). Cut onion half in-half again (pole to pole) and slice thin. Result: thin quarter-onion rings. In a mesh strainer, rinse onion under cold water - allow to drain.
• Chick peas: drain can of beans into mesh strainer, rinse thoroughly with cold water.
• All veggies: when fully prepared, add to giant lentil bowl.
4. Add Italian dressing and parsley
5. Stir. Add a little salt, if needed
6. Done.

SERVING SUGGESTIONS

• Scoop into a bowl and eat with a spoon. It's the least glamorous thing you'll eat - except spray cheese from the can standing in-front of the fridge at 2 in the morning. That's less glamorous.

FAQs

• Is this a joke, or something? >> Sadly, no. In an effort to reduce carbs, I have turned to the lowly lentil. It's high protein and low carb and a good staple when trying to put-together a weight-loss lunch for the office. Cheap and easy.
• What are Pardina lentils? >> These lentils are more robust. When cooked, they stay together. Most other lentils completely disintegrate when cooking and must be handled differently.